MAX CRUS: A lass poor Gladys.
Men should be grateful to women. They're impervious to looks and body shape, and, to their detriment, behaviour. How else can we explain erstwhile squeaky-clean, Miss Goody-two-shoes, Gladys's fraternisation with the ugliest and most crooked man in parliament?
True, as Ms L. pointed out, it wouldn't have mattered who she was knocking, or knocking around with, the media would have a field day mocking, belittling or otherwise castigating her, no matter whether the bloke was 'above her station' or beneath, a la Julia/Tim-the-hairdresser style.
However all of this is somewhat moot, the relationship is over, or will be and quite possibly there will be two new 'former politicians' which begs the question, what's the collective noun for these ousted servants to the people?
Surely there's a word that precedes the phrase 'former politician' that succinctly puts that service into perspective, and there is.
Is that word 'Pride'? Hmm, while many former pollies are no doubt proud of their time in public office, the public seldom agree.
A 'Suit of Former Pollies'? Even a 'Blue Suit' wouldn't fully encapsulate what they have done, although often it's the only thing we remember, and anyway ignores what should be half the population but is in reality only 30 percent, women.
'A Consultancy of Former Pollies' comes close and you could without exception add 'within the realm of their previous portfolio' despite the illegitimacy, but no.
'A Pub Test of Former Pollies', is getting warmer except so few would pass it would render the phrase a contradiction in terms as well as pubs.
Maybe 'A Nest of Former Pollies'? Or more correctly 'A Feathered Nest'? Now we're talking, but it's still not quite on the money even if they were, which is often.
But no. While all worthy contenders there is really only one word that precedes the expression 'Former Pollie', and that word is 'Disgraced'.
So, alas poor Gladys we knew her well, even if that's not how we will remember her, and unlike Bazza O'Farrell, she doesn't even get a bottle of Penfold's Grange out of it.
Let's send her one of these via ICAC :
The Group McLaren Vale 'The Murder' Shiraz, 2017, $35. Definitely one to crow about specially if you like collective nouns and big, fat crows, I mean shirazzes, it's 15 per cent. Its nose is just as big too. 9.3/10.
The Group McLaren Vale 'The Quiver' Grenache, 2019, $35. Made by Game of Thrones fans, this is also a whopper at 15.5! No William Tell games or parliamentary visits (take note Ms Waterhouse) after a few glasses. 9.4/10.
Gundog Estate Hunter's Shiraz 2019, $40. I am tempted to proclaim this Hunter's best shiraz, but equally happy to be averted from such folly if you want to send a better one. 9.5/10.
Gundog Estate Yarra Valley Riesling 2020, $35. Gundog Estate must be huge, stretching from Victoria to the Hunter and beyond. Our gun dog would love that, much as we loved this snappy riesling. 9.3/10.
Topper's Mountain New England Gewurztraminer 2016, $35. (Bottle number 0159 of 1284). Fabulous gewurz and barely 100 cases which is just enough for a decent party, or these days enough for about 1,000 parties, but still rare. 9.6/10.
Toppers Mountain New England 'Hill of Dreams' (Sauvignon Blanc) 2019, (Bottle No.203/516), $40. Talk about a limited run. Barely one bottle number per day for a year and the lassez-faire, free-range winemaking approach makes it even more memorable. Amazing stuff but you probably couldn't do a bottle a day. 9.5/10.