CLARENCE CHATTERBOX: Chance of perfect school pic? Nil
EVERY parent wants the perfect school photo. There is a space on the mantle for their children's school year commemoration every year. Parents put in all the effort ironing clothes, making sure their child's hair is perfect and send them off in the hope the photos they pay through the nose for is the perfect portrait they envisaged.
Some mishaps are unavoidable, a tooth missing one year, little Johnny deciding to cut his own hair or maybe the peanut butter making its way out of their sandwich and landing in the photo line of their perfectly pressed shirt. Acne, braces and bowl cuts, mullets and perms, depending on the decade, will feature prominently.
Other photos will be marked forever in time as direct insubordination against orders that have directly come from a proud parent.
I remember one school photo day in primary school. I am the eldest of two. I would have been about eight and my brother six. I had my hair in pigtails with blue ribbons, my shoes polished and all my teeth, so mum had high hopes. My brother on the other hand needed some reminding that it was school photo day and he needed to stay presentable. Unfortunately, photos were after lunch, and despite warnings at the beginning of the day everyone needed to stay tidy, my brother couldn't comply.
Forgetting to turn up to the photos, I went searching for him only to find him sweaty after a footy match with dirt on his shirt and top button missing. The school photo was still taken, dirt, sweat and all, and now that we are much older makes for a great conversation piece when we catch up.